POETIC MUSINGS

Book Release Annoucement TONGUES IN MY MOUTH Poems by Demetrice Anntía Worley

2011-03-24T11:56:00.000-07:00

is officially RELEASED

Main Street Rag Publishing, March 22, 2011!

Thank you to everyone who has loved me,

supported me, and bought my book.

Without your assistance,
my dream would never have become
this wonderful reality.

Ashé

For detailed information about my book, please visit my Tongues in My Mouth Web site.

Book Pre-Orders

If you placed a “Pre-Order” for Tongues in My Mouth between October 2010 and March 1, 2011, you should soon receive your book(s) because Main Street Rag Publishing is now shipping books across the United States.

Book Launch Celebration

Tongues in My Mouth‘s official Book Launch Celebration will be held at Lakeview Museum in Peoria, Illinois, on Saturday, April 16, 2011, from 2:00 to 4:00 pm.

Scheduled Readings

This spring I will conduct readings in Peoria, Illinois, at Southern Illinois University, Carbondale, and at New York University.

How to Order YOUR Copy of Tongues in My Mouth

You can order your first copy or additional copies of Tongues in My Mouth for $14 (+shipping & handling) from Main Street Rag’s Bookstore (PayPal preferred; PayPal will accept credit cards).

Earthquake and Tsunami Hit Japan

2011-03-11T08:28:00.000-08:00

Sending my prayers and my thoughts across the world to eveyone (and their families who live in other parts of the world) the earthquake and tsunamis have touched. Ashé.

Book Release Date: March 15, 2011!

2011-03-04T19:27:00.000-08:00

Two pieces of great news:

1) Everything is in place for the March 15, 2011, release of Tongues in My Mouth.

2) Price reduction for Tongues in My Mouth, from $14 to $12!

Two Days Left (through March 1) to Buy "Tongues in My Mouth" at $9 Advance Order Price

2011-02-28T08:48:00.000-08:00

It Was on Your List of Things to Do

The Time to Do It Is NOW

Only 2 days left (through March 1) to order
Tongues in My Mouth
at the $9 "Advance" order price.

After March 1, it will cost $14, which is still a bargain!

My Debut Book of Poetry, Tongues in My Mouth, Release Date is March 2011!

2011-02-23T09:41:00.000-08:00

With joy in my heart, I am happy to share with you that I now hold the galley pages for my debut poetry book, Tongues in My Mouth, in my hands (well, in a PDF file)! The book’s release is set for next month, March 2011.
Without the support of my FB fam, CC fam, immediate family members, relatives, friends (those friends I know and the ones I do ot know), and colleagues, this reality could have possibly never occurred. Ashé.

As promised, everyone who bought a copy of the book and sent me a copy of the receipt will receive a Tongues in My Mouth 12 month magnetic calendar within the next two weeks!

Thank you for your timely responses to my call for help. Thank you for making your dollars walk your talk. Thank you for believing in my poetry.

If you have not yet bought a copy of Tongues in My Mouth, it is available until March 1st for $9. After March 1st it is available for $14: www.mainstreetrag.com/DWorley.html

Yours in Poetry, Peace, & Light ~ Demetrice Anntía Worley

The Joy in Your Life: Uncovering Reality

2011-01-18T16:11:00.000-08:00

Tina Turner's wise words are are an anchor point for me today:

"Sometimes you've got to let everything go—purge yourself . . . If you are unhappy with anything . . . whatever is bringing you down, get rid of it. Because you'll find that when you're free, your true creativity, your true self comes out."

~Tina Turner

Thank you for the love

and support you have given me

as I gather joy into my life and

arrange my resplendent bouquet.

Ashé

My First Newspaper Feature Story as the Author of "Tongues in My Mouth

2011-01-15T15:24:00.000-08:00

Please check out "Every Tongue Matters," a two-page feature story, by Chris Cooper, about me and my debut poetry book "Tongues in My Mouth," which appears in the January 13 issue of "Asian American Times." In addition, it includes photographs of me worth seeing! :)

To pull it up:

1. http://www.asianamericantimes.us/
2. click on PRINT EDITION
3. click on JANUARY 13, 2011
4. click on PAGES 10 and 11

Buy a Copy of "Tongues in My Mouth" Today to Help Ensure Its March 2011 Release

2011-01-04T19:02:00.000-08:00

I need your support for my debut poetry book, Tongues in My Mouth. Please place an advance order TODAY!

My book publisher has informed me that because of slow advance orders for my poetry book, he will be forced to move back the publication date for my book by several months UNLESS advance orders are received within the first two weeks of January 2011.

Advance copies of Tongues in My Mouth are only $9 (+2.50 for shipping and handling), and you can order them on-line at the Main Street Rag On-line Bookstore.

According to Nikki Giovanni, international poet, “What an opus Demetrice Anntía Worley has created with Tongues in My Mouth. The stark and beautiful truths she explores are ones we ought to know and begin to view. This book needs to be on every desk. Thank you Demetrice Anntía Worley, for your insight. For your bravery. For your soul stirring. Tongues in My Mouth is an important book.”

More detailed information about my book is available at my Tongues in My Mouth blog and at my Main Street Rag Author's Page.

Without your support, I will not be able to do three book readings in March and April 2011 and the wonderful book launch party I am planning will not occur. Also, please share this information with any of your friends that you think might be interested in buying my book.

Please order your advance copy today and send me a message (demetrice@demetriceworley.com) letting me know you placed your order. When I receive your message I will send you a Tongues in My Mouth 2011 Calendar. In addition, I will have solid advance book order numbers to show my publisher the interest in my poetry.

If you have already ordered a copy, please send me a message (demetrice@demetriceworley.com) and I will send you the Tongues in My Mouth 2011 Calendar, and I will add your order to the number of advance orders placed.

Thank you in advance for your support.

Yours in Poetry and Peace,
Demetrice Anntia Worley

Happy New Year 2011!

2010-12-30T20:11:00.000-08:00

This year I'm not going to make any new year's resolutions. Why? Because I have a diffficult time staying true to them all year long. However, what I am going to do is try to love my life as it is at this moment. I spend so much time thinking about what needs to be done in the future that I don't enjoy the moment in which I am living. But, over the last three weeks of down time that I've spent sleeping and thinking, for the most part by myself, I've to realize that I have a wonderful life, and all I need to do is recognize its beauty and enjoy it.

Wishing you and your family a Happy New Year 2011!

Enjoy every moment and every day to its fullest!

Order your copy of my forthcoming debut poetry book, today.
Thank you for your support!

Randal Horton Receives a NEA Fellowship

2010-12-08T14:16:00.000-08:00

I could not let this day pass without sharing my good friend, Randal Horton's news. He received a National Endowment for the Arts Fellowship!

Tongues in My Mouth, Demetrice Anntia Worley's Debut Poetry Book (Main Street Rag Publishing, forthcoming March 2011)

2010-11-01T12:28:00.000-07:00

Today, on 11/1/10, with great joy in my heart, I am announcing the upcoming "birth" of my first book of poetry: Tongues in My Mouth, Main Street Rag Publishing, forthcoming March 2011. My second blog site contains specific information about the book and to a larger picture of her beautiful face (bless you Rachel Eliza Griffiths, for use of your divine photograph on the cover).

In addition, this site contains “”Author Information”; “Comments” on the book by Allison Joseph, Kevin Stein, and Nikki Giovanni; “The Herstory,” behind Tongues in My Mouth’s creation; a “Schedule” of future readings; and “Contact Information.”

Several links on the site take you to Main Street Rag’s Bookstore where you may purchase your copy at the pre-order price of $9. Remember winter holidays are right around the corner. Buy a second one to give as a gift to a loved one or friend!

If you would like, you can go directly to Main Street Rag’s Bookstore.

Thank you in advance for your support. Ashé

Buy a Book of Poetry a Month and Change Our World

2010-09-29T09:01:00.000-07:00

What IF we each bought 6 NEW POETRY BOOKS by emerging and established POETS OF COLOR whose work we admire? What would happen? Would it change how we think? Would it change how we interact with others? What if we bought 6 MORE NEW POETRY BOOKS by POETS OF COLOR and DONATED them to our neighborhood library, community action agency, Urban League, and heaven forbid, our college/university? Would we change how a child/student thinks? Would we change how people interact with other people? Would it start a ripple that could change the world? Let’s all BUY ONE book a month by a POET OF COLOR and change the world. Ashé

Last month, August 2010, I pre-ordered and paid for Niki Heard's The Language of Shedding Skin, forthcoming, December 2010:

I only have 2 days left in this month to buy my next poetry book!

"Tongues in My Mouth" Has Found a Publishing Home

2010-09-24T16:38:00.000-07:00

On the 40th submission of my book manuscript to a first poetry book contest/poetry publisher (over the last three years), I received an e-mail message stating, "Main Street Rag is pleased to offer you publication if it is still available."

"If it was still available?', I yelled at my computer screen, "Heck, yes [or something close to that]! It is still available!"

Then, everything started moving into place.

Soon and very soon, I will post more information about my forthcoming poetry book Tongues in My Mouth (Main Street Rag Publishing, forthcoming Spring 2011). Right now, I am handling the "most be done" activities that are required to move the manuscript into book form. For example, the front cover is done and the back cover is in progress, I would to give you a "peek" at the front cover, but I have a feeling that my editor is NOT ready for the world to see it yet

Great News: You will be able to pre-order Tongues in My Mouth as soon as it appears on Main Street Rag Publishing's "Coming Soon" page. Your pre-orders will be greatly appreciated as we begin to get out "the buzz" across the nation about Tongues in My Mouth: think YouTube video, post cards, lapel pins, flyers, tee-shirts, book bags, and so on.

Oh, my. I am so happy; I cannot stop grinning!

Must get back to my "book work." {Demetrice winks and nods her head}

A Must READ: Poet John Murrillo's Lyrically Lucid Words: "Some Thoughts After Re-reading Hughes' 'I, Too, Sing America'"

2010-09-09T20:29:00.000-07:00

Listen up people. You MUST read John Murillo's "Some Thoughts After Re-reading Hughes' 'I, Too, Sing America'" an answer" poem/essay/call on the Poetry Society of America's Website. Then, you must make copies of it and put them in your pocket. Pass them out on your local corners. Plaster them on you office doors, cubical walls, blogs, and newspaper editorial pages. And then, share them with your students so
                                     .....
                                     "they'll see how beautiful [we poets of color are]
                                     And be [informed] --

                                     [We], too [are] America[n poets.]”

                                                                         ~ "I, Too," Langston Hughes

Photograph by Rachel Eliza Griffiths

"John Murillo is the current Jay C. and Ruth Halls Poetry Fellow at the Wisconsin Institute for Creative Writing. A graduate of New York University’s MFA program in creative writing, he has also received fellowships from the New York Times, Cave Canem, and the Fine Arts Work Center in Provincetown, Massachusetts. He is a two-time Larry Neal Writers’ Award winner and the inaugural Elma P. Stuckey Visiting Emerging Poet-in-Residence at Columbia College Chicago. His poetry has appeared in such publications as Callaloo, Court Green, Ploughshares, Ninth Letter, and the anthology Writing Self and Community: African-American Poetry After the Civil Rights Movement. Up Jump the Boogie is his first collection" (Quotation from Craig Santos Perez's, "Poet Spotlight: John Murillo" that appears on "Harriet: A Blog from the Poetry Foundation").

Tara Betts, Author of Arc & Hue, Begins Sharing Other Poets' Poems via YouTube

2010-09-02T10:07:00.000-07:00

Hearing poetry read is medicine for the soul. In her own rights, Tara Betts is an outstanding poet. Her first book of poems, Arc & Hue, will leave you breathless.

Her latest venture is to orally share poems on YouTube. Become a follower. Her poem choices are interesting and thought provoking. If you were to read one poem aloud to other people, which one would you read and why?

Tara Betts' "Poetry EPs" reads Crystal Williams' "The Wives' Tales"

"Tara Betts shares a poem by a poet in this ongoing web series and briefly discusses it. This debut episode features Crystal Williams' 'Troubled Tongues'(Lotus Press, 2009), her third book and winner of the 2009 Naomi Long Madgett Poetry Award."

Happenings beween April & July

2010-07-23T10:34:00.000-07:00

TRAVELS

Since April I've been working hard at my daily job. One of the joys of my job is I have the opportunity to travel abroad and teach a writing class. This year I traveled to Australia where I had a great time teaching a great group of students and spent hours walking around Sydney. I even walked across and back on the Sydney Harbor Bridge. Truly a moving experience as the sun set filling the sky with muted pinks, purples, oranges, an yellows. I carried my writing journal with me everywhere I went and am looking for a few poems to come out of my Australian adventures.

POETRY

The poems having been coming s-l-o-w-l-y, but I am not worried. They will come. On the other hand, the visual images for my "When the Caged Bird Sings" art exhibit are FIERCE and they are coming fast and furiously. Yesterday, I made myself laugh aloud when I thought "This birdcage exhibit has to come together otherwise I have no excuse for my house looking like it should be on Horders."

Recent good news about my poetry:

* My poetry manuscript "Tongues in My Mouth" was a semi-finalist in the 2009 Crab Orchard Review First Book Prize. Another verison of this manuscript was a semi-finalist in the 2007 Crab Orchard Review First Book Prize.

* "Tongues in My Mouth" was also a semi-finalist in the 2009 Many Mountains Moving Press Poetry Book Prize.

FICTION

In January I made a resolution to start writing fiction and/or creative nonfiction in addition to writing poetry. Well, when I attended the AWP (Association of Writers & Writing Prograpms) Conference in April this year, I entered a Knee Jerk Magazine's (an online literary journal)Extremely short Fiction (75 words)Best Buddies Contest. Guess what? My extremely short story "The Truth and Nothing but the Truth" as a runner-up for the prize. It appeared in Knee Jerk Magazine, Issue 11, May 2010.

"LAST WORDS"

As I work on several writing projects at one time(two edited anthologies; new poems and mixed media art for "When the Caged Bird Sings"; and a new poetry manuscript "Beneath the Surface") the following quotations has given me inspiration:

* "The role of a writer is not to say what we all can say, but what we are unable to say." ~ Anaïs Nin

and

* "You are a creator. What are you creating? There are 2 types of people: those who run with an idea to its execution, and those who make excuses as to why it can't be done, then get upset when someone else makes it happen. Now is the time to follow through. I await your great idea." ~ Opal Palmer Adisa

May these quotations inspire you, also.

Peace

My First Art Exhibit! "When the Caged Bird Sings," Fall 2011

2010-04-01T05:20:00.000-07:00

Put it on your calendar.
Firat viusal art exhibit:
"When the Caged Bird Sings," by Demetrice Anntia Worley, fall 2011. What is it? Mixed media on canvas/within confines/poetry & fiction on the page/posters. Exhibit will be shared "in person/rss/videotape/photographs."

After two years of contemplation, collecting, and sharing every available space in my house (listening to my Significant Other repeatedly ask why do have I have all of this "stuff"), garage, and rented-storage space, and my "baby" is on creation's cusp.

On Writing a Poem-a-Day

2009-10-28T13:24:00.000-07:00

For the last 13 days, I have been attempting to write a poem a day with a group of 8 writers who are scattered across the United States and France. Over half of the writers have been able to create a poem-a-day. And I am not talking about poems that are full of flat, surface-level language and images. My contrabutions to the group's efforts have been a decent one page poem and a haiku. This small production, however, does not reflect the agnast and physical discomfort (tension in my neck and back) I have experienced as I sat in front of my computer or paper pad and tried to will words into images, into lines.

In April 2009 I attempted to write a poem a day, and in the process, I created a poem which included a reference to what would occur at my mother's funeral. Five days after I wrote the poem, my mother died of a massive stroke. Here I am six months later sitting in front of my computer, finally able to admit my mother's death occuring right after I wrote that fateful poem scared me silent. This fear and my sense of life's flatness has kept me from writing a poem-a-day during the last thirteen days. (In total, I have written four poems since my mother's death).

Confession is good for my soul: At this junture in my life, my muse will not sing, and I cannot write a poem-a-day. I do not know if I will ever be able to write a poem a day. I pray to create a poem-a-week. Ashé

Poem 3/4 for my November 2009 Four Poems in Four Weeks. Note: I had to use underlines to make the spacing work in this blog entry. In the actual poem, I used white space, not underlines, to space out the words.

Creation

i.

Today, after months
of reading, I began
meditating.
Today, words,
my first mantra.

ii.

My words
are____my____breath.
I____inhale

deep

________ly.
____I____release
_____________________slow____ly.

Open Mic Reading at Peoria Contemporary Arts Center

2009-09-26T14:37:00.000-07:00

The two recent poems I wrote about my mother, "To Whom It May Concern—Written on the Back of a Denny’s Place Mat, April 15, 2009" and "Five Days after I Write about My Mother’s Funeral, She Suffers a Massive Stroke and Dies" made their public debut on September 17 at the Peoria Contemporary Arts Center Open Mic night. They were received with sadness and joy which touched my heart immensely.

I attended the open mic night at the urging of two of my graduate students, Rachael (center) and Ready Rae (right). Rachael's poems shocked the audience out of their stereotypes about her based on her appearance. Whereas, Ready Rae's poetic images took them to intimate places.

A funny aside: I was compelled to read barefooted! A first for me. For some reason, I knew I would be able to read the poems with crying if I could feel the stage without with my sandals. It worked. I didn't cry, but instead, felt great peace before, during, and after the reading.

My Poetry Chapbook Femicide/Femcidio and Donating to a Worthy International Cause

2009-09-07T00:21:00.000-07:00

Because . . .

* Women are not disposable!

* The murdered and disappeared women and girls of Ciudad Juarez most not be forgotten!

* I am a world citizen who wants to bring about a positive change!

I would like to sell 50 of my Femicide/Femicidio chapbooks between September 7, 2009 and May 15, 2010, in order to donate $2 from each sale, for a total of $100, to Amnesty International to help end the femicide/femicidio in Ciudad Juarez. The chapbook which contains my 2009 Split This Rock Poetry Contest Third Place winning poem is available for purchase for $8 at http://artfulrevisions2.artfire.com/.

Thank you for your support. Peace

2009-08-17T16:08:00.000-07:00

If you do not get the chance to hear me on Literary Nation Talk Radio at noon on August 20th, perhaps you can attend my talk "Giving Voice to Women Writers" at 6:00 pm at the Willie Hinton Neighborhood Resource Center, Little Rock, Arkansas.

"Giving Voice to Women Writers," Women Writers Night Out

Host: Say It Loud! Women Empowerment Series
Type: Education - Workshop
Price: FREE
Date: Thursday, August 20, 2009
Time: 6:00pm - 7:30pm
Location: Willie Hinton Neighborhood Resource Center
Street: 3805 W. 12th Street
City/Town: Little Rock, AR
Email: info@speakloudly.com

Demetrice Anntia Worley On Literary Nation Radio Show, August 20, 2009

2009-08-17T15:27:00.000-07:00

Please tune into Literary Nation Radio Show on August 20, 2009, as I am one of the interviewees:

Literary Nation Talk Radio

KABF FM 88.3 Little Rock, AR. and live on the internet www.kabf.org Noon CST/1:00 p.m. EST/10:00 a.m. PST

12:03 p.m. Call-in Dr. Carol Lee, educator and author of Culture, Literacy and Learning http://www.sesp.northwestern.edu/profile/?p=72&/CarolLee/
Co-founder Bettye Shabazz International Charter School http://www.bsics.net/aboutus.html

12:20 p.m. Call-in Sonia Barrett, writer and radio host http://www.sovereignmindradio.com/main/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=1&Itemid=5

12:40 p.m. In-studio Dr. Demetrice Worley, educator, writer, educator and Cave Canem Fellow. http://www.demetriceworley.com

During the 1960s and 1970s, Walter Cronkite Told Me the News and I Believed Him, Always 1917 - 2009 ~ R.I.P.

2009-07-18T06:36:00.000-07:00

Colored Girl

In 1968 when Martin Luther King Jr., died,
I stopped being colored.

Sitting cross-legged,
on avocado shag carpet, I watch,
expressionless, our nineteen inch
black and white television—
Samantha Stevens rides her broom
side-saddle across Bewitched's
opening credits. Newsbreak:
Walter Cronkite’s pale eyes
do not blink as he informs
the nation, Negroes are rioting,
on Chicago’s west side, in Harlem,
Watts. Across our Zenith’s screen,
light and dark gray images shift,
people running, buildings burning,
a colored man, carrying a naked
white mannequin, raises his fist,
cries, Power to the people.

I wondered about darkness, as only
an eight-year-old child can wonder—

That April evening,standing
in my parents’ bedroom,
forehead pressed against
the cool window pane,
I watch the orange glow
from the riot’s flames, radiate
on the Chicago’s horizon.

when would blackness envelop
my caramel-colored skin?

Michael Jackson 1958 - 2009 ~ R.I.P

2009-07-07T08:47:00.000-07:00

Until now, I have kept quiet about the passing of Michael Jackson. However, today is his funeral and I would like to post the following quotation from James Baldwin to which my friends Reggie and Randall introduced me today:

"The Michael Jackson cacophony is fascinating in that it is not about Jackson at all. I hope he has the good sense to know it and the good fortune to snatch his life out of the jaws of a carnivorous success. He will not swiftly be forgiven for having turned so many tables, for he damn sure grabbed the brass ring, and the man who broke the bank at Monte Carlo has nothing on Michael.

"All that noise is about America, as the dishonest custodian of black life and wealth; the blacks, especially males, in America; and the burning, buried American guilt; and sex and sexual roles and sexual panic; money, success and despair--to all of which may now be added the bitter need to find a head on which to place the crown of Miss America.

"Freaks are called freaks and are treated as they are treated--in the main, abominably--because they are human beings who cause to echo, deep within us, our most profound terrors and desires."

--- James Baldwin from his 1985 essay, "There be Dragons," in The Price of the Ticket

"Vibe Magazine Shutting Down"

2009-06-30T14:05:00.000-07:00

I looked through Vibe (NOTE: I did not say I was a reader of the magazine) several times during its 16 year run.

The "death" of any magazine or journal takes my breath away. A vision has died. Words have been silenced. Ashe. Ashe

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Vibe magazine shutting down ~ Source: http://www.dailyfinance.com/2009/06/30/vibe-magazine-shutting-down/

"Vibe magazine, the urban-music magazine founded in 1993 by Quincy Jones, is the latest victim of the media recession. Multiple sources both within and outside the magazine confirmed that it is shutting down. . . ."

2009 Split This Rock Poetry Contest ~ Third Prize

2009-06-24T11:21:00.000-07:00

My seven-part poem "Femincide/Fimicidio--The Murdered and Disappeared Women of Ciudad Juarez, Mexico" and I are clapping are hands and saying, "We believed. We believed. We believed." The poem placed third in the 2009 Split This Rock Poetry Contest! For placing third in the contest, I will receive $250, receive free registration for the four-day "2010 Split This Rock Festival: Poems of Provocation & Witness," Washington D.C., March 10-13, and have my poem posted on Split This Rock's Web site.

According to Split This Rock's Mission Statement:

Split This Rock believes that as citizens and artists, our obligation has never been greater. Our intent is twofold: To call poets to a greater role in public life and to bring the vital, important, challenging poetry of witness that is being written by American poets today to a larger and more diverse audience.

The goals of Split This Rock are:

1. To celebrate the poetry of witness and provocation being written, published, and performed in the United States today.

2. To call poets to a greater role in public life and to equip them with the tools they need to be effective advocates in their communities and in the nation.

Every poem has a home: on a page, in a literary journal, on a bus, in a writer's mind, on the Web, in a subway station or train car, in an anthology, on a billboard, on a broadside, or in a writer's notebook. I'm thrilled and humbled that "Femincide/Fimicidio ..." 's home is Split This Rock!

The poem will appear soon on the Split This Rock Web page: http://splitthisrock.org

Ashe. Ashe.

The Toy Seller (1857-63) by William Mulready

2009-05-28T07:55:00.000-07:00

Future poem inspiration.

Art as Protest: Irish Painters Use Catholicism to Protest Against the British Government

2009-05-26T18:35:00.000-07:00

My students and I went on an excursion to the National Gallery of Ireland to view Irish artists' paintings and scupltures. To illustrate how visual artists make political protests while living under an oppressive government, several students and I viewed and discussed the painting Opening of the Sixth Seal(1828) by Francis Danby, an Irish painter. The sixth seal is a reference to Revelations 6:12 in the Bible. The painting's motif is antislavery; the abolishment of slavery was a major topic in Ireland and England in 1820s. Britain abolished the slave trade in 1807, but slavery continued in the British colonies until 1833.

The First Poem I Have Written Since My Mother's Death on April 20, 2009

2009-05-08T19:52:00.000-07:00

Five Days after I Write about My Mother’s Funeral,
She Suffers a Massive Stroke and Dies

“The rhythm of the heart is not given by the brain.
It comes from the heart's own pacemaker, a small node
of special heart muscle called the sinus node or sinoatrial node.”

I.
When the doctor tells me
my mother is brain dead,
my heart stutter steps,
then resumes its normal
at rest 86 beats per minute.
When he says my mother
is on a ventilator, I remember,
breathing is only possible
with a functioning brainstem,
a fact learned 27 years ago
for a college biology test.
He asks if I heard him. I’ll be
in Las Vegas in three hours.
Do not take her off the ventilator.

II.
For the last two hours, I have watched
A monitor’s iridescent green peaks
and valleys map, my mother’s beating
heart; I have heard the ventilator’s
hiss floosh hiss floosh hiss floosh
while my mother’s white sheeted chest
rose fell rose fell rose fell

III.
Watching my mother’s still eyelids,
I nod slightly, hear a metallic click,
then nothing. An unnamed man
removes medical tape from the sides
of my mother's smooth hazelnut face,
from a hard white plastic funnel in her mouth.
He de-snakes a green-wetness
clogged clear plastic tube from her throat.
Her right shoulder seems to draw up.
Deep inside her body, fluid gurgles.
Her heart’s pacemaker continues
to regulate 66 to 70 beats per minute.

IV.
Beside my mother’s machine crowded
bedside, I want to hear the blunt closing
of blackness as it swallows sadness;
I want to feel the clean edge of forgetfulness
slice my scalp; I want to smell the slickness
of blankness smearing my fingers; I want
to see the grit of thanklessness smooth
this white man's flat condolence; I want
to taste the of elasticity of thickness continuing
to pump blood in and out of my mother’s heart
residing in her breathless body.

Instead, I wet my right index finger,
wipe away a glob of green wetness
from my mother's gapping mouth;
place my left hand on her chest,
whisper, Shush. You have done well.
Her heart’s pulse plummets,
35 beats. No need to keep fighting,
25 beats. 18 beats 11 beats 6 beats
An even green line marks her ending.

V.
My heart stutter steps, then resumes
its normal at rest 86 beats per minute.

Poems 3 & 4: NPR 30 Poems in 30 Days

2009-04-16T06:24:00.000-07:00

To Whom It May Concern—Written on the Back
of a Denny’s Place Mat, April 15, 2009

I completed my 2008 tax forms,
and mailed them. I now understand
where last year’s salary went
down to my tithes, gambling losses,
charitable donations to my job,
and Planned Parenthood, plus
the thousand dollars to my mother
that I couldn’t claim, gifts
are not deductible her garage needed
new siding because the neighbors
don’t like seeing peeling paint,
warped boards on a 53-year-old garage
I wished I could have helped pay
for the garage roof, but I had to make
second mortgage payments
on my house’s roof, furnace, air
conditioning yes, we are aware
we are privileged, we are middle
class, she retired after driving
a school bus for 29 years, serving
as a county deputy sheriff for 3 years,
and holding pieces of part-time jobs
for 12 years, I have a full-time career
as a university professor, we own/are paying
for our houses, our cars and the neighbors
can’t see her basement’s bowed back
south wall needs repair because
when it rains two inches of water
pours through its crack but she can
pump the water out and throw away
another chair or end table, all that is left
of her father’s/mother’s estate or a few
more picture albums containing my childhood
skinny, ashy legs, knobby knees/elbows,
eyes too big for a thin oval caramel face
faded pastel Kodak photographs because
mold keeps growing in the basement
even after she pumps out the water,
even after she sprays Lysol disinfectant
for ten minutes because any more time
than that and she can’t breathe
and my brother who lives with her
can’t stay down in the basement family room
for more than 5 minutes because it sets off
his asthma and he’s trying not to get pneumonia
this year because last year it took the State of Illinois
8 months to ok his asthma meds and
he can’t afford to use too much of it because
he won’t have money left out of his
four hundred dollar monthly SSI check he’s legally blind
after he gives my mother a little help
on the household bills, mortgage payment, and food
because he can’t feed himself with the eight dollar
monthly State food allowance and my mother says
she can’t put him out because he is her son and he can’t see
and if she did put him out who would hear her
in the middle of the night when the pain
from her Sickle Cell Anemia cuts her breath,
who would hold her arm, help her to the bathroom
when the pain in her left hip is so hard she can’t support
her own weight or bend down far enough
to get on the floor and crawl to toilet because
he has to pee really badly because
the Sickle Cell Anemia has weakened her bladder,
kidneys, heart, eyes, joints, but we are glad she is with us
even if she’s in pain because doctors once said
she wouldn’t live past 35 years and last September
she turned 68 more than old enough for Medicare,
but she won’t go to a doctor because Medicare
won’t cover the total costs for a hip replacement
and she can’t afford the co-pay on her retirement pay
and Social Security payments, besides she doesn’t
have the money to cover the Medicare “doughnut hole,”
and she doesn’t have any other health insurance,
but if she dies, her $250 Social Security death benefit
and the life insurance policy she paid for over 20 years,
will provide enough funds for us to bury her
in a low-end casket surrounded
by red and white carnations
while the choir sings her favorite hymn,
“His Eye Is on the Sparrow.”
This is all to say, I would like an itemized
account of how my 2008 paid withholdings,
Federal Taxes, FICA, and Medicaid were spent;
I’m requesting the same from the State of Illinois.
I do not want a refund, just an accounting
so I can explain to my retired mother why
she and her legally blind son live the way they do,
and I can say without a catch in my throat,
"Thank God we live in America."

Poem 3: National Poetry Month 30 Poems in 30 Days

2009-04-09T12:51:00.000-07:00

New World Food Store, Jackie Robinson Parkway,
Queens, New York—A Found Poem

"From a NYC taxi window,
the world is a blur."

Staples—
Ice
Beer
Cigarettes
Fruit
Vegetables
Milk
Cold Heroes

Poem 2: NPM 30 Poems in 30 Days

2009-04-03T09:04:00.000-07:00

Remember the Day We Discovered the Poetry of Ntozake Shange

As you nurse the baby by the opaque windows,
your words fill the gap between now and the day
we discovered the poetry of Ntozake Shange.

You weave a tale of joining the peace corps, falling in love,
intestinal parasites, and conceiving, with words colored
like the Ecuadorian tapestry hanging between the opaque windows:

ochre, violet, green threads intertwined on an ecru background.
Your tale's aesthetic hangs in the air, then disappears.
Remember the day we discovered the poetry of Ntozake Shange?

We wept as a rainbow’s hues colored our black and white lives,
as pain waltzed clumsily. Paper collects dust on your desk;
nursing the baby by the opaque windows,

you don't have time to fill pages with crafted phrases,
to layout tales of dark eyed women, slow days, and fertile earth.
Do you remember the day we discovered Ntozake Shange?

We said we would weave our words, our rainbows’ hues,
into resplendent cloth, enwrap girls, women.
As you nurse the baby by the opaque windows,
remember the day we discovered the poetry of Ntozake Shange.

Lesson #1 - Poem 1/30 NPM 2009

2009-04-02T02:09:00.000-07:00

Lesson #1

Kiss
index finger,
let lips tarry.
Part plump smile,
ease moist pink tongue
out, saturate
finger tip’s coolness.

Now, open
my hardback haven.
Turn my dry pages.

Happy National Poetry Month ~ April 2009

2009-04-01T10:50:00.000-07:00

I made a connection today that had previously evaded my consciousness: My birthday month is the same as the U. S.'s National Poetry Month. In honor of my recognition, I'm going to honor my self by attempting to write a poem a day. Even as I write these words, I'm laughing to myself--sometimes it takes me a year to write one poem--because I'm making a promise to write